Build Bridges - The Power of Relationships 3

Written by Uyoyou Christiana Charles-Iyoha

It takes time to build a relationship but most often, people do not invest in maintaining a relationship. However, relationships like engines are meant to be oiled and serviced. Conflicts also arise in the process of maintaining a relationship.

Problems arise in relationships when needs are not being met and by the way, needs vary. There are spiritual needs, physical needs, emotional needs for affirmation, financial needs, material needs and a number of other needs. Even in Church, people come to Church to have their needs met and when their needs are not met, they bicker. Problems then are a wakeup call to the fact that needs are not being met in a relationship.

Ways to Maintain Relationships

Effective Communication – communicate your needs at all times. Do not take it for granted that the other person can read your thoughts. State your needs point blank so that your partner, friends or family members understand what your needs are. However, you also need to know and understand whether the persons concerned have the capacity to meet your needs. If they do not, then do not put pressure on them to give what they lack the capacity to provide. You may be shocked that some people lack the capacity to provide even spiritual and emotional support which ironically they drain from other people. They take it for granted that other people will always be there for them. They may not be selfish or wicked. They just lack the capacity to do so. Do not begrudge them.

As much as possible, avoid judgmental statements as they inflict pain. You can prayerfully and lovingly communicate the situation without inflicting pain. It is great to speak plain language so that you can easily clarify issues. It is not a village meeting especially in some parts of Africa where the elders speak in hard to understand proverbs which may further becloud the issue.

Avoid the blame game – honing on and magnifying other people’s mistakes to humiliate them. There are people who are endless faultfinders and who blame everything on other people. They never admit their mistakes. Learn to take responsibility first. Nobody in a relationship wants to be told that they are not good. Rather, take responsibility and resolve issues. Stop blaming other people and situations. While constructive criticisms are welcome in a relationship especially the ones which bring out the positive in peoples’ lives, it is instructive to not argue to win. Be tolerant enough to listen to the other person.

Make it a habit to always add value to the relationships in your life.

Build Bridges - The Power of Relationships 2

Written by Uyoyou Christiana Charles-Iyoha

No human being is a self-sustaining island. Relationships are pivotal to success but significantly, relationships differ and are at different levels. There are relationships with fellow human beings at different levels.

There is also the most important and significant of relationships which is your relationship with God. Spiritual relationships are more important than biological ones – Luke Chapter 17 verse 21, 23 verse 21. Relationship with God is critical. In this relationship, humans generally take it for granted that God supplies every need of theirs according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus. This is true. God has been and is still in the business of meeting the needs of humanity especially His own. However, God also has needs which He expects humans to also meet. One of such needs is to accord Him the respect He deserves from you as well as give Him quality worship.

Beloved, God is great and mighty in power and deeds. He created the entire universe and owns everything in the Universe and everything including you and I are subject to Him. Therefore, reverence and worship should flow spontaneously from our hearts to Him in quality praise and adoration. This gladdens the heart of God. Sometimes, challenges and what you consider competing priorities but which are not really priorities may becloud your mental processes and you forget or decide not to worship. Please repent and return to the place of deep reverential fear for God and worship the King of kings and Lord of lords to whom all honor, glory and power belongs.

Glow from Within

Written by Uyoyou Christiana Charles-Iyoha

Confidence Boosters/Beauty Secrets

The secret of a wonderful woman’s beauty, youthfulness is that she is always happy and because she is always happy, she radiates inner peace, joy and happiness which translates into youthfulness and beauty. I noticed this in the life of a woman I have known for more than thirty years.

I also noticed that she always glows from within, again, a function of the peace of God which she always chooses to radiate; irrespective of what the circumstances are. Surprisingly, I know quite a lot about her; her philandering husband who does not even bother to hide his indiscretion; the fact that she has only one biological child in a country where having dozens of children is a criteria for a community award and a goat slaughtering party for the woman concerned. Yet, this woman is always full of wide brimmed smiles and compassion for other people. She is always happy because she chose to focus on God and not the circumstances. Despite her age, there are no furrows or wrinkles.

Beloved, you can also glow from within if you always radiate the peace, joy and happiness of God for that is what translates into youthfulness and beauty.

Sarah, the wife of the biblical patriarch Abraham and mother of Isaac was described as beautiful because she had a clam and quiet spirit. The gentle and quite spirit was a result of her trust in God and the Apostle Peter refers to this beauty as incorruptible beauty. It cannot be tainted by anything. Please read 1^st Peter Chapter 2 verses 1 to 6, Genesis Chapter 12 verses 11 to 15.

Do Not Fear

Written by Uyoyou Christiana Charles-Iyoha

For years, a particular person always spoke to intimidate me and terrify me into inaction, wallowing in fear and always terrified; afraid to succeed in life. I was always emotional and traumatic; having no self-esteem and self-worth. But one day in the afternoon, God exposed the person and the intent of the talk – get me afraid, worried, tensed up and believing that I will never succeed. But all these evil strongholds were destroyed as God made me understand that no one speaks and it comes to pass when He did not command it.

First, the Holy Spirit took me to the one verse of Scripture I read that morning – Philippians Chapter 4 verse 8. As I reflected on meditating on the truth, I realized that all the evil pronouncements against me and my loved ones as well as using evil words to try to chart the courses of our lives were a lie from the pit of hell which would never see the light of day because they are not the truth of the word of God.

Secondly, the Holy Spirit reminded me of what Goliath said to the army of Israel as the devil used him to torture the army of Israel mentally and by extension spiritually and physically for forty days and forty nights. The army suffered for this length of time because they believed the lies and evil report of Goliath against them, lies designed to incapacitate and immobilize them to a spot, neither moving forward nor backward.

But one day, Goliath and his lies collapsed like a pack of cards before David, a mere teenager who had never served in the army and who had never been to war. Why? Because David knew the truth of the word of God and refused to accept the lies of Goliath. Rather, David challenged Goliath and his lies with the truth of the word of God and in no time, that same day; Goliath vacated the face of the earth so that the people of God could enjoy peace and progress in their land. Please read 1^st Samuel Chapter 17 for full details.

Thirdly, the Holy Spirit reminded me of what the older brothers of Joseph said about how Joseph’s dreams would come to pass. Though they attempted to kill Joseph which would have made their words come to pass, God foiled their plans and Joseph’s life was spared. Eventually, Joseph was sold to the Midianite traders who also sold Joseph to Potiphar in Egypt. Unknown to Joseph’s ten older brothers, they were instrumental to moving Joseph to God’s height, plans and purposes for Joseph’s life.

Identify and Deploy Your Launch Pads as Leverages

Written by Uyoyou Christiana Charles-Iyoha

A man’s gift makes room for him and brings him before great men. Proverbs Chapter 18 verse 16

Every human being created by God has divine or what you may call natural leverages divinely given by God to elevate the person in his or her life. The challenge usually is knowing and understanding that you have leverages. So the start point is getting to know and understanding what leverages are; identifying your own leverages and deploying them to advantage. What then is leverage? Leverage according to the Longman Contemporary Dictionary of English is the influence that you can use to make people do what you want.

Talents, skills and expertise, what I like to refer to as divine intellectual property most often serve as launch pads into divine greatness if properly deployed into divine purposes and activities. This is to say that talents, skills, and expertise are divinely designed to move a person to greatness, affluence, fame and honor progressively, from point A to point B if they are intelligently used as leverages. Ideally, they are meant to be used as launch pads to leapfrog present positions to higher positions. To some extent, they are leverages. Joseph could interpret dreams. He used the ability to interpret dreams which launched him into Pharaoh’s presence as leverage to become Prime Minister in the land of Egypt.

Why You Should Exercise Dominion

Written by Uyoyou Christiana Charles-Iyoha

The sum total of what I do with TIME

Sleep, eat, laze about or work

Or jest, gossip, curse

Or study the WORD, meditate the Word

Worship God in quality praise

Ascribe honor to Him Who gives me dominion

Or feed my eyes and mind on worthless things

Dominion, how I invest or fritter time

Dominion is the birthright of every child of God. God created you to have dominion. It was not an afterthought. Please see Genesis Chapter 1 verse 28. To exercise dominion is be masters, to rule and exercise control. Beloved, God created you to rule, to exercise control over His creation. Please read up Psalm 8 verse 6, Genesis Chapter 1 verse 28, 1^st Kings Chapter 4 verse 24, Psalm 110 verse 2, Proverbs Chapter 4 verses 23 to 24, 1^st Peter Chapter 1 verse 13, Luke Chapter 10 verse 19 for details and Holy Spirit inspired insight.

You need faith in God to exercise dominion. Therefore, anchor your faith in God and not people, resources or circumstances. The word of God is a major component of the Christian faith which explains why you should exercise your faith on the basis of the word of God. Please read 1^st John Chapter 5 verses 1 to 12. Christians are to walk by faith and not by sight as instructed in Hebrews Chapter 10 verse 38, 11 verses 1 to 40, Habakkuk Chapter 2 verse 4, and Romans Chapter 10 verse 17. The word of God is what builds your faith.